How Deep Is Your Love?

As we come to the end of a month dedicated to love and to the celebration of Black History, we wonder: how can we show Black people more love?

Bria: One way that comes to mind is showing Black people love without a tragic event being the impetus for care or concern. There are so many ways to impactfully love Black people without participating in empty, performative gestures. Let’s go deep people! Dig! Make it count (measure). Make it matter (impact). A card for Valentine’s Day is nice, but fixing the garbage disposal is sexy! Garbage disposal is both literal and figurative here. What are some ways you show Black people love?

Katura: Can I just say that this blog title has me singing Dru Hill in my head? But to answer your question: One of my favorite memes says “friends who shout Ayyyye when you dance are necessary.” It’s such a fun reminder that love and support show up (and out) in many ways. (Shout to my friend Jack who is the ultimate hype person.) I think another way to show Black people love is to “let” us just be. Sometimes expectations - even the seemingly good ones like ‘she’s an A student’ - are heaped so high it’s oppressive. Let’s give Black people room to change their minds, try something new, learn, say no. Let folks know they’re appreciated — period. We have a tendency to tie praise to accomplishments and appreciation to favors or acts of service. I think we need more ‘just because’ love. Personally, I show love by supporting and celebrating Black people, our stories, businesses and projects. What about you?

Bria: I just did the Dru Hill hop in my head! Showing Black people love with my time (commitments), my money (where and how I spend it) and my mind (offering my talents and skills) are the ways I show Black people love. I just want to help make room for Black people to live free and liberated, especially Black girls and women. So, whether I’m helping to flip tables or build them I want to participate in creating equity that currently does not exist. 

Bria: Love has been on my mind a lot since the beginning of this year. At the foundation of love - whether it’s for a partner, family, friends or the community - is self-love. How do you show yourself love?

Katura: So self-love and self-care look the same for me. You know I’ve gotten good at prioritizing self-care: knowing and honoring my boundaries, saying no, giving myself grace, carving out time for fun. One big area of growth for me is giving myself time to relax. Not necessarily sleep, but relax and allow my mind to wander instead of writing content or strategizing in my head. Once I turn that corner you won’t be able to tell me nothing!

Bria: Music stays popping up in my head when we talk! “Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all.” I do see self-love and self-care differently with both being very necessary to moving toward fulfillment, freedom and liberation. I also believe that learning to love myself will be a til’ death do we part exercise. Showing myself the same grace and compassion I strive to show others is at the top of my self-love list. Letting kindness for myself manifest into self-acceptance.

Katura: My social media was a Black love fest this month: I posted a new Black business, org, or resource on my IG stories every day. I saw lots of people showing love that way too. I hope it continues. Beyond shouting out and supporting Black institutions, I also decided I would only watch programs that centered or celebrated Black folks this month. Between Netflix, Hulu, YouTube and good ol PBS, there was a lot of good content available. Plus I have “Eyes on the Prize” on dvd. I plan to watch a few eps on Feb. 28 to end the month right! Did you do anything special for Black History Month to show our folks love?

Bria: Since I was stuck on love, I read books by Black authors that focused on love. I watched content that focused on the beauty and resilience of Black love. I listened to music that celebrated Black love and Black people. Now I’ve got to think about how I want to end the month! I feel like a glass of Uncle Nearest on the rocks seems apropos.

Katura: So what’s your favorite love song? I’m going with “As” - Stevie.

Bria: You love asking questions that have 100 different answers! OK, I could choose multiple songs from this one artist, but this is one of my favorites: “Day Dreaming” - Aretha

Katura: What about your favorite ‘I love Black people’ song?

Bria: Currently it’s “Black” by Buddy. It solidly drives home the point.

Katura: Right? That energy! And the video of the Black women dancing to it? In fact, let’s end with that: WATCH 

Bria R. Griffith is a multi-industry organizational leader on a mission to connect community and business to implement strategies that promote social and economic equity.

Katura Hudson is a writer and strategist with a passion for community; diversity, equity & inclusion; and New Edition.